sick and sad
I had a real sad day yesterday. I have a lot going on at the moment. I am a bit depressed. I have a lot of negative self talk going on within me. I am thinking of getting some more counselling. I have some sessions up my sleeve with the counsellor I saw after my split up.
I got diagnosed with asthma on Wednesday. I thought I had a relapse of the cough/cold. However, this time it was worst. I cant breathe after a coughing spell. I havent been sleeping well because of it either since the weekend. I was urged/ordered by a special friend to go to the doctors. I had a very quick after seeing the doctor for like 10 minutes I went and got the medicine, a reliever. I didnt know how to use it. I felt unsure Id be confident enough at home so I went back and talked to the receptionist. She made me an appointment to see the ASTHMA nurse. She was AWESOME. I talked to her for maybe 30 minutes and she was EXCELLENT. I didnt have to pay for her advice, even though thats all the doctor did really. She was as interactive as he was if not more. Showing me how to use the inhaler for example. Giving me some info and a diary. To try to find out what tiggers it. She wants to see me in 3 weeks.
I was surprised the doctor knew straight away more or less what was wrong with me.
I have been told, I might have it before in the pass I was always told to go home and clean the house etc. This doctor did seem a little better and at least gave me the diagnoses. I do feel especially after seeing the nurse that she was much better and informative.
I am seriously thinking sending B13 to school. I really wanted to home school him. However, his attitude isnt good either. He is stubborn and rude. He doesnt really respect me. I have taken away his TV, music system and cell phone until further notice. I feel some what responsible for his behaviour as his mother and feel like a bad mother.